::: English Lesson :::

[Frederik]

C’mere, youse quickly learn that yarn, mustn’t be ascared. Aye, it’s a wee like naff invaded Saxon: Ach: A regional word that's usually placed at the start of a sentence. “Ach go on.”, “Ach you know?” - Is that you?: Regional question. “Are you finished?”

[Aoife]

ach ni ni ur sum cracker Freddy ;)

Da anscheinend Interesse besteht hier eine Kostprobe O-Ton aus unserem Belfast Forum:

jeez olive, yur oful cruel ta yur tom!!....dus his thumbs nnat be awful sore hanging from thon basket???...ehhh??...hired yu like it!!!!..

Auch wenn alles andere unklar bleibt, warum mein English auch nicht besser ist als mein Deutsch ist da wohl keine Frage mehr ...

Liebe Grüße, Aoife

[Frederik]

ach A scottish version of saying 'oh'; instead they say 'ach noh' - Ach noh i've lost me kilt.

ni ni Spanish slang term used for describing a generation of youth (between 16-35 years old) that neither studies nor works. No ocupation at all, they usually leech their Parents' resources. This word is originated from the conjunctions used in this sentence: "NI estudian NI trabajan".

ur Moronic, half-assed spelling of "your" or "you're" used by close-minded, slow chatroom/AOLer individuals who can't type fast enough, and will use the excuse: 'i hav 2 use slang coz i am tokin 2 lots ov pplz unlyk u LOLZ', even though I could talk to several people without using a single abbreviation.

sum a lazy persons way of writing the word 'some', also one of those idiots who likes making things shorter by taking of the last letter of last few letters. some = sum

cracker Originally the white slave driver because he would "crack" the whip, hence the noun cracker. Yo homey pick the cotton faster cuz here comes ole Mr.Cracker with his whip!

Freddy a) an amazing best friend, who can be trusted with anything. He is cute, nice, strong, smart and trustworthy. He knows exactly where to tickle you, and he can always make you smile, even if you’re having a terrible day. He’s always nice, and will protect the ones he loves. He’s the best friend ever. b) A pervert, someone who constantly thinks about sex.
Make sure you lock up your wives and daughters, a freddy is coming to town.

;) cum grano salis
----------------------

jeez Jesus

olive, I love you

yur a) Another way of saying "You," "Yur and Yur are coming with Mur," - "You two are coming with me," (Und ich dachte, das wäre Ostfriesisch. Waren die auch mal zu Besuch?)
b) Short for "you are"

oful wohl “awful”

cruel Being nasty. Singin to a blind man, "I can see clearly now the rain has gone."

ta A slang word for Thanks. The word is a result of the heavy Danish influence on the English language. Most people do not realize that the English language roots are really Danish or Jutland. Equipped with this knowledge this word is easy to decipher.
The Danish word for Thanks is tak. In Scotland and upper England it was common to drop the k at the end because of the way words were pronounced during the time of old English and Middle English. Hence the slang word "Ta" which should actually be pronounced "TA-k" but over time became "Ta" is really Tak meaning "Thanks"

yur Short for "you are". "Yur da bomb shawty"

tom!! a) the man responsible for the monstrosity known as "myspace", owner and operator of said site, and consequently the man blamed every time myspace is down.
"god damnit! myspace shit the bed again. fuck you tom!" b) Has extreme likeness to a Matt. A Sexy Best. 'Toms' are known to be genius' and to be extremely skilled and gifted in the field of literature. Commonly seen without a shirt due to their exemplary physique. Toms also are known to have great moral values and being very sensitive to a woman’s needs. c) The best boyfriend a girl can ask for. Will do anything for you and will love you with all his heart. Any girl who dates him will be the happiest girl on the planet. Advised for: Rachel, Natasha, Lauren, Samantha.

....dus

his

thumbs a) One of your five fingers. That's right! It's a FINGER. The thumb is a finger, so fuck you assholes who say you have four fingers and a thumb! b) What makes us genetically superior. I have opposable thumbs, so I am better than you. c) The unattractive and/or short and/or fat person in a group that the others will eventually ditch before the night is over.
d) The bump that forms in the zipper of mens' pants that is often mistaken for an erection.
Girl: Look at that boner !
Guy: It's a thumb goddammit...THUMB I TELL YOU!

nnat nat: 34 z.T. stark widersprüchliche, teils vehement abgelehnte, manchmal nicht ernstgemeinte Bedeutungen

be

awful

sore 1) In pain from a previous injury. When sore, there is still some pain, but it is gradually decreasing. 2) An injury that is healing slowly. 3) Upset about an incident that took place some time ago.

hanging

from

thon Northern Irish (Ulster Scots) equivalent of 'that'. Thon girl has a face like a busted sofa. Especially appropriate in France, meaning tuna.

basket??? a) A reference to the outline of the male genital area as viewed through pants/swimsuit/undergarment. See also package. Term often used by gay men in assessing the potential size of a potential suitor. b) item, into one of which you should not put all your eggs.
Margo: A tisket, a tasket, I lost my yellow basket...
Alice: Did you have all your eggs in it?
Margo: Yes.
Alice: ...Damn.
(und fünf andere, stark abgelehnte Bedeutungen)

...ehhh??

...hired To be high and tired at the same time.

yu

like

it!!!!..

[Aoife]

Du machst dir ja eine Mühe

Kurze Erklärung: Es geht um Tomaten (rhyming slang: Tom thumbs) die in einem Hängekorb gezüchtet werden. Und zum Spaß (craic - wie crack gesprochen, daher cracker) werden Tom thumbs in Bezug auf Tom's arme Daumen diskutiert, die ja ganz wund sein müssen wenn sie an einem Korb hängen.

hired yu like it: "how would" sprechen wir in norn iron wie "hired" (= gemietet) aus, also: Wie würde das dir denn gefallen

Zum Schottisch:

Urrrrr ye Scottish? Ahh um. Ye ken yer a troo Scot if ye can properly pronoonce Ecclefechan, Sauchiehall Street, St Enoch, Auchtermuchty and Aufurfusake. Yer used tae 4 seasons in wan day. Ye kin faw aboot pished wioot spilling yer drink. Ye kin make hael sentences jist wi swear wurds. Ye know irn bru is a hang-er cure. Ye actually unnerstawn this message and yer gonnae repost it !!!

Love, Aoife

[Frederik]

Not being able to even get a Scottish accent into my head is annoying the hell out of me...

Are you Scottish? I am. You know you're a true Scot if you can properly pronounce Ecclefechan, Sauchiehall Street, St Enoch, Auchtermutchy and Aufurfuksake. You're used to 4 seasons in one day. You can fall about pissed without spilling your drink. You can make whole sentences just with swear words. You know (unsure about the next word) brew is a hang-over cure. You can actually understand this message and you're going to repost then/it?

I can probably pronounce the place names. I wouldn't want to try the last 'name' with ladies present though. (Weil Sake ein sehr unschottisches Getränk ist.)

[fraences]

Humpty Dumpty sat a wall,
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall,
all the Kings horses and all the Kings men,
had too put Humpty Dumpty together again.

[Aoife]

Danke, Fraences!

Ich nehme an du kannst verstehen dass ich nach diesem Beitrag Schwierigkeiten habe, hier *nicht* im Sinn einer englischen Assoziationskette weiterzumachen ...

Von dem mock turtle über walrus & carpenter zur red queen und und und ....

You took me down the rabbit hole and through the looking glass

Hugs, Aoife

[Aoife]

Physics is like sex. Sure, it may give some practical results, but that's not why we do it. - Richard Feynman

[Aoife]

The Overt Dictionary

The Leftists: people who insist on having humane ideals instead of bizarre financial dreams

[Aoife]

Four and twenty virgins
Come up from Inverness
And when the ball was over
There were four and twenty less.

Refrain:
Singing, balls to your partner
Arses to the wall
If you've never been shagged on a Saturday night
You've never been shagged at all.

The Vicar's daughter she was there
She had them all in splits
Jumping from the mantelpiece
And landing on her hands and knees.

The Vicar's wife was also there
Sitting by the fire
Knitting contraceptives
Out of india-rubber wire.


So etwas wurde noch vor wenigen Jahrzehnten ganz selbstverständlich gesungen, da hat es niemanden interessiert, ob Kinder oder Jugendliche anwesend waren.

Deshalb bringe ich dieses Volksgut auch hier, als Beleg dafür, dass die Behauptung moderne Medien würden unsere Kinder sexualisieren und früher sei alles soooo viel anständiger zugegangen blanker Unfug ist.

Liebe Grüße, Aoife

[Aoife]

Always remember to forget
The things that made you sad.
But never forget to remember
The things that made you glad.

Always remember to forget
The friends that proved untrue.
But never forget to remember
Those that have stuck by you.

Always remember to forget
The troubles that passed away.
But never forget to remember
The blessings that come each day.

[fraences]

Dear Aoife, that is a nice poem to start my day.Thanks.Love Fraences

[Aoife]

John, woke up after the annual office Christmas party with a pounding headache, cotton-mouthed and utterly unable to recall the events of the preceding evening.
After a trip to the bathroom, he made his way downstairs, where his wife put some coffee in front of him.
"Louise," he moaned, "tell me what happened last night. Was it as bad as I think?"
"Even worse," she said, her voice oozing scorn. "You made a complete ass of yourself. You succeeded in antagonising the entire board of directors and you insulted the president of the company, right to his face."
"He's an asshole," John said. "Piss on him."
"You did," came the reply. "And he fired you."
"Well, screw him!" said John.
"I did. You're back at work on Monday.

[Aoife]

Some fellow went to buy deodorant
"Roll on ball-type?" the shop assistant asks
"No - for me armpits."

[Aoife]

Another deodorant one?

The instructions on the label read: remove cap and push up bottom
Hurt a little bit, but now it smells lovely every time I fart ...

[Aoife]

What is brown and sticky?

a stick of course ...

[Aoife]

The supermarket has stopped selling tropical fruit!

It's enough to make a mango crazy!

[Aoife]

"if government shuts down, who's in charge of taking all the poor people's money and giving it to the rich?"

[Aoife]

Bloke in Church...
'Father', he confessed, 'it has been one month since my last confession. I had sex with Fanny Green twice last month.'
The priest told the sinner, 'You are forgiven. Go out and say three Hail Mary's.'
Soon thereafter, another guy entered the confessional. 'Father, it has been two months since my last confession. I've had sex with FannyGreen twice a week for the past two months.'
This time, the priest questioned, 'Who is this Fanny Green?'
'A new woman in the neighbourhood,' the sinner replied.
'Very well,' sighed the priest.. Go and say ten Hail Mary's.
At mass the next morning, as the priest prepared to deliver the sermon, a tall, Voluptuous, drop-dead gorgeous redheaded woman entered the sanctuary. The eyes of every man in the church fell upon her as she slowly sashayed up the aisle and sat down right in front of the priest. Her dress was green and very short, and she wore matching, shiny emerald-green shoes.
The priest and the altar boy gasped as the woman in the green dress and matching green shoes sat with her legs spread slightly apart, but just enough to realise she wasn't wearing any underwear.
The priest turned to the altar boy and whispered,
'Is that Fanny Green?'
The bug-eyed altar boy couldn't believe his ears but managed to calmly reply,
'No Father, I think it's just a reflection from her shoes'.

(kleine sprachliche Erläuterung: Dieser Witz stammt aus Derry, "fanny" bezeichnet daher nicht wie im Amerikanischen den Hintern, sondern das vordere weibliche Gegenstück dazu)

[Aoife]

Habe ich das wirklich noch nie hier eingestellt gehabt?
Falls doch: Man kann es ja auch gut 2x sehen


[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V5emWgD2Rh8[/youtube]